I’m not doing well at the moment. Really not well.
My problem is the lines between physical ailments (including my CFS) and my depression are blurring like never before. Previously with my anxiety my symptoms have presented them with physical problems mostly related to headaches and stomach issues.
I have been nursing a headache of varying degrees for the past few days, just when I think it’s gone it comes back. My stomach is causing me all told of problems. Namely my sickness is back, the baby is sitting high so pressing on my stomach causing heartburn. Due to the restricted space when I do feel like eating I can only manage a few mouthfuls of eat meal and I am left feeling full for a very long time meaning grazing or small spaced out meals aren’t much better. At this stage in my pregnancy (28 weeks) I am supposed to be eating 300 more calories a day (not the eating for two glut normally claimed!) but I am struggling to get to 1200 calories a day just as it is let alone 2300. Naturally this adds to my anxiety as although the baby will be ok feeding off my fat stores it is leaving me completely wiped out.
So right now I feel awful, lethargic, headachey, stiff in places, hurting in others. The baby has entered a more active phase and she is beating the hell out of my internally, Izzy was never as active as this! Add in I’m not sleeping which, for me is disastrous (see To sleep, perchance to Dream) as I struggle with pregnancy insomnia and night sweats.
So where do my physical symptoms stop and my depression take over? To be honest I really don’t know right now, a lot of how I am feeling can be classified under CFS or depression and no doubt pregnancy puts an immense strain on the body… I just don’t know, I only hope I find out soon or it’s going to be a miserable few weeks until the birth.